You may or may not have heard about this phenomenon of pick-up sweeping the globe these days.  Popularized by Neil Strauss’ “The Game” and VH1’s “The Pick-Up Artist,” guys are now getting help in fulfilling their evolutionary purpose in life:  getting laid.  They’re armed with tricks, tactics, techniques, (cue Kanye West’s “Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger, cue joke about being harder, cue THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!) all developed to get the ladies in bed.  Ain’t that grand?

To be honest, not really.  Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not denying it works.  A few friends of mine (and when I say friends, I don’t mean myself) have field-tested the various theories and dynamics and have confirmed their effectiveness.  So the approach is revolutionary AND it works.  What’s wrong with that?

Well, it’s pretty fake.

I don’t know about you fellas out there reading this, but I don’t believe in tricks and tactics and routines.  I don’t want a checklist of things to do in my head before I get the girl.  One thing that most people don’t realize about Pick-Up, or The Game, or whatever it is they call it, is that it’s about value.  You say clever things to show value.  You dress up to show value.  The thing is, it’s not real value, not the way most people do it.

I think Mystery got it right when he said “It’s not about picking up girls.  This is about building a life.”  How about you say clever things NOT to show value, but just because you’re clever?  How about you dress up NOT to impress, but just because you’re cool like that?  Wouldn’t you rather be really confident, as opposed to be pretending to be confident?  How can you be cool if you’re trying so hard to be cool?

Just talking aloud.  There was a point to all this, but I sort of forgot.  Feel like I’m in the Twilight Zone.

(cue Twilight Zone theme)

OOH!  Why is CAT6 afraid of CAT7?  Because CAT7 ATE 9!

Last Sunday, I brought my brother to XS for his basketball semifinals game. I was looking forward to shooting a few baskets myself that bright Sunday morning, but I knew that wasn’t going to happen as soon as I saw the traffic around school.

Apparently, there was a women’s volleyball tournament happening that day, and while I would normally embrace such a situation (specifically, a gym full of women in short-shorts), there’s a proverbial ring around my finger, and can you spell “statutory rape”? Watching all these student athletes in their element, I felt pangs of regret and jealousy. I could have probably made varsity had I wanted to; if my passions had been redirected sooner. Then there would be more to me than just my rapier wit and pretty boy-ness.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see the XS team’s starting center making conversation with two volleyball players. The girls were most probably seniors and he was a freshman, but he towered over them in height. He is one of those guys who grow a full mustache at 12. It was really funny seeing these kids go at it. By then, one of the girls had her arm around him, and the other was giggling uncontrollably. And I thought to myself, “He got game.”

***

Just a little something I wrote a while back.

What I wouldn’t give for Brazil vacation packages.

After two Friday night games and two other games with my cousin and his friends (mainly the 2002 GCHS varsity team), I’ve done some thinking about where my game is at the moment.

Here’s the breakdown:

Ball-handling: C+ (alright, not AYT!)

I’m still one of the better ball-handlers no matter whom I’m playing with.  Noticed that I haven’t been as good with the behind the back dribble, though, and my spin move is all but non-existent.  Also, I had the ball stolen once from me last game.  It was part bad decision-making, part bad footwork, hence the C+.

Shooting: B- (baskets could be better)

You know what helps?  Shoot from inside the paint, both sides along it, all the way to the free throw line.  Start with set shots, then do jumpers.  You’ll be fine come game time.

Offensive Moves: B (meaning, you can’t stop me unless you’re Black)

I can still pretty much get my shot off anytime I want to, and I’ve made a few highlight reel worthy moves.

Finishing: D (DAMN.)

Maybe it’s because my game is more mid-range than anything, but I’m very awkward with layups and drives, unless it’s during the fast break.  My footwork needs a lot of work,  but it’s really more of the mentality that needs to change.  I can get to the basket if I wanted to, but somehow, my feet don’t think it’s such a good idea, and it shows.

Passing: B+ (blackhole no more)

Nobody can deny this.  I’ve been passing a lot lately; passing more than I am shooting the ball.  My teammates are happier.. although it makes me wonder if I wouldn’t have a better win-loss record if I passed less and shot more.

Rebounding: D (demoted)

When I was in a league before, the captain of my team wanted nothing more than for me to rebound.  So he spent a lot of time teaching me how to box out and rebound.  As a result, I helped my team get a ton of boards, either by grabbing them myself or boxing opposing players out.  We won that tournament, and months later, I’ve forgotten everything he taught me.  I still get the occasional boards, though.

Defense: F

Let’s not even talk about this.  It was a layup line everytime we went into a Zone scheme.  Man to man, though..

Overall: C 

Offense is still pretty good, endurance is sad, defense is even sadder.

I think is my longest post ever!  Do I take this game seriously or what?

I’ve got to give it to Johnson & Johnson, they’ve really grasped the concept or corporate responsibility.  I was browsing through their website, and it’s pretty obvious they believe that protecting the environment is just as important as making a buck.

Of course we all know J&J as a huge corporation with lots of stockholders who want to make money, but I think they serve their stockholders just as well by trying to save our planet.  They do this by not only complying with set environmental standards, but by making sure they affect the environment as little as possible.  A messed up ecosystem means no profits for anyone in the long run, after all.

But don’t take my word for it.  Go check out JnJ.com for their sustainability report and energy policy.  Seeing is believing, so go see for yourself.  Maybe some of you can convince the corporations you work for to go eco-friendly as well.

Here we go.  I’ve got four minutes before I should be shooting baskets, so I’ll make this fast.  For those of you who asked, my band’s name was/is The Conceited Man band.  We weren’t that big, so I seriously doubt we’re Google-able.  Try YouTube *ahem*.

Watching Boston Legal right now.. I used to want to be a lawyer, but I dunno.  I guess I’m looking for what’s going to bring in money the fastest these days.  A guy’s got to do what a guy’s got to do, right?  I know, I know, I should get some digital signage that says “whore” for my forehead.  Cash moves the world, babe.

5 minutes now; so much for my 4-minute blog entry.  But whatever.  My dinner’s still settling in, anyway.  For those of you wondering, I had beef soup, vegetables, and noodles.  No rice.  Gotta make sacrifices.  Underwear model trumps bodybuilder, any day.

At least I think it’s 99 days to Christmas.  Been a little busy, been a little stressed, but I’ve also been eating a lot.  I’ve made some really good strength and muscle mass gains, though.  All those carbs and fat really do wonders.  The abs, of course, are a different matter altogether.

So tonight, I’m going to play basketball.  From 7 til 9pm, I’m shooting hoops.  I was thinking about walking the dog, but I’ve decided that I like smelling nice.

Speaking of Christmas, what’s everybody getting me?  I’ve got a couple of suggestions, like maybe rc helicopters, or a fishing trip, or a new wooden court.  It’s all good.  If those aren’t good for you, how about something else?  Here’s a clue:  Starts with “M”, rhymes with “oney”.

Just suggestions.

Most of you probably don’t know this, but I used to be in a band.  Not your average garage band just jamming all the time, but a REAL band, with gigs, and shows, and an appearance on MTV.

Another thing we also had was a lot of drama.  Thinking about it, I think we could’ve made it.  We weren’t bad-looking (I mean, have you seen me?), we could play basic stuff, and we had a pretty good repertoire of songs.  It would’ve also helped that we played MPC- Music Pang Chicks.  Isn’t that what sells these days?

We should’ve done more in terms of marketing, though.  I could’ve written sappier, sell-out songs.  Worn more body-fitting shirts and skin-tight jeans.  Flirted with the audience more.  Maybe even spread some rumour about some bogus past regarding drugs, alcohol, and streetfighting.  Or we could’ve just given out promotional pens, whatever.

Ah well.  That was a long time ago.   Time to get back to work!

It’s been a stormy couple of nights, windy, gale-like, power-outage-causing.  I’ve always had a soft spot for rain.  I still remember waking up at 5am, finding out that classes are suspended because of rain, and spending the rest of the day playing ONLY the best RPG ever made, Lunar: Silver Star Story Complete.

These days though, I’m not such a big fan of rain.  Not only is the commute tougher, but it’s now impossible to play basketball at night.  Now I’ve played hoops in tough weather, but it’s pretty impossible to play when the deluge is almost blinding.  But anyway.

Check out my blog.  It seems like such a ho-fessional.  Advertisements everywhere..  I am such a sell out.

Oh, and I bought a book today!  “Top Secret Restaurant Recipes”.  They don’t have the TGIF burger, but they DO have Pizza Hut pizzas.  Let’s see how accurate the recipes are.  Yes, I know I’m dieting.

When is the easiest day of a diet?  The second day, because by the second day, you’re off it.

Sometimes, I just want to leave it all behind and go to France.  I’d hang out in some cafe, sip on a Latte, and greet ladies with a hearty “enchantee”!  Of course, I don’t have the money to just get away from it all and see gay Paris, so I’ll just live vicariously through this travelogue on France.

This guy’s pretty thorough.  Whether you’re looking for Assurance vie or a hotel paris bed and breakfast, he’s got it covered.  I don’t blame him.  If I were in France, I’d be living life to the fullest and blogging about it, too.  Anyway, it’s pretty cool.  Definitely one of the places I have to visit before I die.  Maybe I’ll go Lance Armstrong and join that bike race.

I don’t really know if any of my readers have issues regarding penis enlargement, but just for the hell of it, I’d like to throw it out there.  If you ARE looking for some male enhancement products, you might want to try out Cost Price Online.  They’ve got some pretty good male enhancement products and reviews, so at least you have an idea about what you’re getting.

Cost Price Online’s got a pretty wide range of penis enlargement pills, which increase bloodflow and circulation in the area you want serious bloodflow and circulation in.  The result?  No “shooting prematurely” or “power failures”.

And my equipment is working just fine, thank you very much.